RECAP: Beauty and the Beast – Episode 15 – Any Means Possible

Museum galas are not about art; they are about epic second kisses, hotness overload and wrongly attributed murders

After the much anticipated kiss FINALLY happened [after only 14 sexually charged episodes], fans all over the world were waiting for something else to happen. The episode starts and BAM! No beating around the bush, they jump right into the action! I was all “Wait! This is happening already? Give me time to settle in before you send me on an emotional roller coaster!” We hear a sexy Depeche Mode song and then realize Vincent and Catherine are heatedly making out in the middle of the dimly lit WAREHOUSE.  Clothes start flying and he pushes her on top of the bed. And yes it is damn HOT. I thought even the blue veins were sort of hot. If you think about it, the scene wasn't graphic at all [especially if you compare it to what we see on cable], Cat was fully clothed for God’s sake!  Yet I thought it was one of the sexiest things I've seen on television. You know how actors always say shooting this type of scenes is “no fun at all”, that they are too concerned with the camera angles and whatnot… Yeah… I don’t buy it. And if this is what “not having fun” looks like… sign me up for no fun anytime!

Anyway, the scene continues while I reached for a glass of cold water with lots of ice. Suddenly, Vincent pulls away and starts breathing heavily. Vincent tries to pull through it and, for a moment it kinda gets hot again, but then he goes into a full Beast transformation which isn’t so hot [unless you think scary is hot]. Vincent-Beast grabs Catherine lifts her over his head and throws her across the room. Then he walks towards her as she begs for mercy and just when he is about to maul her… Vincent wakes up from his nightmare. Then he does what any hot guy would do after having a dream about killing his girlfriend: He has an Arrow moment. He gets out of bed and starts going about his day wearing only jeans and no T-shirt [not that I notice that type of thing]. Of course, a true “Arrow moment” would have involved him doing push-ups… but he never gets a chance to do that because Cat arrives at the WAREHOUSE. She gives him the lame excuse that “she was in the neighborhood”. Doing what exactly? Visiting her other biochemist friends who live in abandoned warehouses?

Vincent: I'll just put a shirt on
Everyone watching: NO!

Whatever… Cat just wants to “hang out” and JT-wingman-extraordinaire conveniently leaves them alone so they can “hang out” for “several hours” [sounds like a WONDERFUL plan to me]. However, Vincent isn’t so thrilled about the prospect and his first words to Cat are “I’ll just put a shirt on” and I swear I could hear the women all over the world yelling “NOOO!” at unison. Unfortunately Vincent didn’t seem to hear us so he starts getting dressed and tells Cat that he “needs to get going” [to his non-existent job, visit his non-existent friends or whatever the hell a ‘non-existent-dead’ man does]. Poor Cat tries to figure out what is causing this behavior. I know … he has a very good and noble reason and I totally understand his concerns; however, Cat has no idea about that and if you look at it from her perspective he is just being such a guy!  He does make it a little bit better by giving her a kiss on the cheek and the shirtless image is a little hard to erase.

In the meantime, Evan is at M CENTRAL [Has he been there since the night before? Or is this a follow-up meeting?]. Sorenson is there [duh, he is obviously also M’s NYPD liaison] and there is a new agent: Agent Kyle, but I will call him “Agent Twilight” [because he was on Twilight (*), in case you had more dignity than me and never watched it]. Agent Twilight does most of the talking and looks like he isn’t keeping the promises Sorenson made to Evan [cross-training, career advancement, etc]. Evan is noticeably upset and Agent Twilight gets a little suspicious about his motivations. Fortunately, Agent Twilight doesn’t figure out that Evan wants to catch the Beast because he is in love with the daughter of their former beast making scientist who in turn is in love with the aforementioned Beast. That would have totally been my first guess [OK, maybe not]. Still, Agent Twilight doesn’t believe Evan is “Muirfield Material”. What is “Muirfield material” anyway? It seems to me that Evan is perfectly capable of handing out BUSINESS CARDS!  Things get a little out of hand and Evan shoves Agent Twilight against the wall [unaware of the fact that he might be a vampire, I guess Evan also had more dignity than me and never watched Twilight]; but Sorenson stops him because, unsurprisingly, he may also be Kyle’s bodyguard.

"Can I take a shower first?"

Meanwhile, Cat is at the GYM suffering from Tess withdrawals, so she is having some girl talk over the phone with Brooke. Cat complains about the “stagnant situation” of her relationship. Cat is NOT the type of girl to just ambush a guy wearing nothing but a towel and then dropping it to the floor, so she tells Brooke: “It’s more complicated than me stripping down naked and saying ‘do me do me now’”. Brooke doesn't get a chance to reply because someone else does by saying: “Can I take a shower first?”. It’s ADA GABE LOWEN (Sendhil Ramamurthy) who also happens to be shirtless. 1) That’s gotta be one of the best character introductions in this show and I love Sendhil! 2) Did someone from Arrow direct or write this episode? It sure looks like it [not complaining]. So, Gabe points out that she is in the wrong locker room, but she proves him wrong by showing him the “Breast Cancer” poster hanging on the wall… a little hard to argue with that. He leaves, but not before mentioning that “anyone who passes on the chance to get naked with Cat is out of his mind” [Or a cross species creature with adrenaline issues, never judge before knowing all the facts!]”.

Cat goes to the PRECINCT and, once again, tries to mend her broken relationship with Tess using FANCY COFFEE [hey, it would totally work on me]. It works a little better this time and Tess agrees to give Cat “2 minutes of girl time”. Cat uses her very generously given 2 minutes of girl time to talk about Vincent [probably not the best move to get on Tess’s good graces]. Anyway, Cat explains her frustrations and goes from calling Vincent an “ass” to comparing him to Football trophies… you know… the natural evolution of any relationship. Then she starts telling Tess about her embarrassing encounter with the handsome “half naked guy”, but she is interrupted by the arrival of Joe and the handsome half-naked guy… except no-one is naked in this scene. Bummer [where did the Arrow producer go?]. Joe is all “here are my very professional detectives, who right now are discussing their love life… also I am so not sleeping with that one”, then he explains ADA Lowen will be setting shop at the precinct for a while in order to ensure the capture of the “vigilante” [OK the shirtless scenes were a welcome Arrow moment, but are they going to start using the word “vigilante” every 5 seconds now? That’s not so cool]. We also learn that Joe brought a couple of trigger happy cops GARNETT and NEWELL [I wonder if they are better at catching Vincent than M agents and if so? Do they have business cards?]. Tess is the first to be called in to have a little chat with Gabe. At the beginning I couldn’t tell if Gabe was a flirt or a closeted serial killer [both?]. The first thing he says to Tess is “So, how’s Joe doing?” and I swear he sounded like he knew they were having an affair. After a while Gabe moves from grilling Tess about Joe to grilling her about Cat, questioning why they aren’t BFFs anymore and where do ripped out pages from dead reporters’ notebooks go. You gotta give it to Tess because, even though she was mad at Cat, she had enough loyalty to keep quiet.

JT-WINGMAN-EXTRAORDINAIRE returns to the WAREHOUSE expecting to find a very satisfied Vincent but, unfortunately, he just finds the usual “sulking Vincent”. JT points out that even he gets laid by the 23^rd date, the implication being that Vincent should be able to get laid before that [yeah…  1^st date or no date at all sounds about right]. Vincent starts explaining his concerns, but their “boy talk” is interrupted by the arrival of Cat. JT leaves… again to resume his pencil-throwing activities. Cat starts by telling Vincent she “is afraid” and he immediately assumes it is about him, but she’s talking about the manhunt Joe is orchestrating. Without wasting any time, Vincent starts his usual self-loathing-trip. He mentions he always knew he would end up dead, but thought it would be to the hands of Muirfield. He is also upset about the newspapers painting him as a “cold-blooded-killer”.

Cat comes up with the brilliant [and I say that sarcastically] plan of finding the missing assailant so he can testify on Vincent’s behalf and make him look like a “hero” or something. Vincent get’s all “I belong in a cage blah blah self-hatred blah” and Cat gets frustrated [understandably]. Finally he admits he is pulling away because he is afraid of hurting her. He tells her about his sex dream, which didn’t have the happy ending we were hoping for. Then he tells her that he was with a woman two years ago and beasted out in the middle of it. OK, I have a lot of concerns about this. First of all, who was this woman? Let’s assume she was just some random hook-up, but why isn’t anybody more worried about this?! Could she ID him? Did she report the almost attack? Where is she now? Anyway, Cat very carefully asks him if he killed her. By the way she was looking at him, you could tell she was completely ready to deal with the situation had he answered positively to her question. There was no rejection in her eyes and more than fear, she was showing concern. Nevertheless, Vincent didn’t kill the woman. Cat points out that he has always been in control when he is with her, but his reply is somewhat unexpected:  “The truth is, I’ve never felt more out of control than how I do when I am with you”. And I know, it was meant to be tragic, but it was SO romantic!

JUMP CUT TO Vincent and Catherine going over the “let’s find and threaten the Loan Shark” plan. Apparently, Darius borrowed money from a loan shark affiliated with the East River Crime Syndicate. As they go over the possible complications of the plan Vincent tries to grab Cat’s hand and she pulls back! WTH?! I guess that’s what happens when your boyfriend tells you he almost killed a girl the last time he tried to have sex. Still… not cool. Vincent apologizes and explains he didn’t tell her sooner because he was afraid “she might hate him as much as he hates himself”. Cat does a pretty good job at apologizing by saying: “How could I ever hate you? It would be like hating a part of myself.” Aw... He says he wants to be with her [we are back at being open and not cliché yey!] and Cat says he is preaching to the choir [the choir being US, all the female viewers, I guess]. They agree to keep their hands to each other for the time being. Since they won’t be having fun any time soon, they go back to discussing their plan. Cat shows Vincent the file of a guy named CURTIS ROTH and, although he is not the loan shark they are looking for, he may know him. Cat offers to go talk to him. Vincent doesn’t want her to do it because he is afraid they will know she is a cop. OK, I already said KK finally won me over and convinced me she could be a cop, however… “cop” definitely not the first thing anyone would think when looking at her. Having said that, I like that he is protective of her and he also looks like someone more likely to approach a loan shark than Cat.

So Vincent goes alone to the loan shark bar to talk to Loan Shark Curtis. He tells Curtis someone named “Stocky Green” [that sounds like an Irishman porn-star name or something] sent him. Vincent gives him a “retired army, me guns, you money” BS speech. And I gotta admit, “criminal Vincent” was kind of doing it for me… Vincent plays a little hard to get and leaves as soon as he presents the fake deal to Loan Shark Curtis. I guess he thought it was a good deal because he immediately calls his friend Loan Shark Ray [who is the loan shark we have all been waiting for]. Loan Shark Ray (Ray Sheckman) is actually a well-known portfolio manager. Much like myself, Ray wasn’t completely satisfied with his finance career, but instead of taking up blogging and screenwriting he decided to dabble on illegal loan sharking.

Cat goes to the MORGUE and asks Evan to find something to link Ray to Darius’s murder. Evan informs Cat that Garnett and Newell [I need a nickname for those two… Garwell? Nenett?] are also after Sheckman and he also realizes this Ray character might be the “only” person who has seen the “vigilante” “up close” [but not AS close as Cat, that’s for sure]. Cat leaves and Evan immediately gets out his M-card. He talks to Agent Twiilight [wow Sorenson isn’t M’s phone operator? I am a shocked] in order to re-negotiate their arrangement, but M’s corporate culture is more about “killing first, hiring later”; so Evan decides to take care of the “witness” himself.  After leaving the MORGUE, Cat spots Gabe and decides to [try to]work him a little. She casually asks him about his investigation witch hunt UNDERCOVER BEAST HUNT “informal appraisal”. He tells her he’s been avoiding her because he knows she must have done something major to piss off Tess, but he also believes she is a good cop. Once again I couldn’t tell if he was flirting with her or secretly planning to murder her [both?]. He also tells her that they are closer than she thinks [for a moment there I thought he might be Vanessa’s son] and then tries to bond over murdered moms. OK, regardless of his intentions, murdered mom is a sad thing, so I felt for him [the pretty eyes didn’t hurt either]. They finish talking and as he leaves his hand gets a little shaky. Now, I must be pretty dense because the only thought that crossed my mind at that point was that he was probably lying, but everyone else on twitter predicted what was actually going to happen with Gabe. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Later, Cat’s at her BEDROOM and she gets a late night visit from Vincent. But for some stupid reason they are still sticking to that “hands to ourselves” nonsense. Cat tells him that she found Loan Shark Ray, but that he is a very well connected Loan shark, which explains why he hasn’t been arrested. However, Ray is also a multifaceted guy [he should apply for a job at M] because on top of managing portfolios and lending money he is also a supporter of the arts. Cat found out he was on the board of the Whitmore Museum and that he will be at the opening Gala. They decide to intercept Ray at the gala before anyone else has a chance to find him. Turns out, the opening Gala is also a MASQUERADE which is very convenient for our favorite supposed to be dead soldier.

The party at the MUSEUM is on full swing. We see Vincent in the middle of the crowd wearing a black mask and a tux [why anyone would ever compare him to Batman is beyond me]. Cat arrives at the gala and makes an entrance as she comes down the staircase wearing a beautiful dress and sporting the most incredible eye makeup. Because that’s exactly what you do when you go undercover to threaten a loan shark, you hire a professional makeup artist and spend hours getting your eyes done instead of just wearing a mask. Whatever the case, she looks absolutely stunning. I thought it would have been a funny nod to the Disney movie if she had worn a yellow/golden dress, but I guess this was a much more flattering color. As she walks down the stairs, Vincent takes off his mask and seriously he looks SO ridiculously HOT it is painful to watch. I almost feel like it should be illegal to be that good-looking; he is like a walking heart-attack-trigger! I definitely got a little bit of a hotness sensory overload [Did I just spend half a paragraph talking about how hot Jay Ryan looked? Oh yes I did, hell I could probably write an essay about it!]. Anyway, when Cat finally reaches Vincent they have a “moment” which is cut short because they spot Loan Shark Ray and get back to their original plan for the evening.

Meanwhile, at the PRECINCT, Joe is drowning his sorrows with a bottle of Whiskey [not MacCutcheon in case you were wondering] and I really felt bad for him. He just lost his baby brother! It’s pretty sad [even if he is cheating on his wife]. Tess walks into his office and tries to subtly point out he is being too extreme with the manhunt. Then she uses the vigilante as a segue into their relationship and suggests they hit the “pause” button. It is probably the most sensible thing to do, but Joe doesn’t agree. He tells Tess she is the only thing that makes sense in his life and then looks at her with the saddest puppy-dog eyes. I can’t really blame her for caving [those eyes were seriously sad!]. She kisses him and it is pretty hot, not Vincat hot, but it was hot.

Speaking of hot, is time to go back to the MUSEUM. Cat approaches Ray by snatching his Rubber-band-Martini [or whatever the hell that thing was]. She flirts with him and, using her amazing eyes [I guess the makeup paid off after all], she quickly convinces him to give her a private tour of the Asian Gallery exhibit. She walks upstairs with Ray trailing behind her. Once there, Cat makes Ray play a COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK [Seriously, couldn’t she just attack him as soon as he got there?]. After a few minutes, she finally points her gun at the back of his head which makes him realize she didn’t really think he was “cute” after all. Cat gives him the low down on how she wants him to be an honest loan shark and make her boyfriend look good in the process. He isn’t too keen on the idea and he quickly figures out she must be a cop, a desperate cop. Ray ain’t no dumb loan shark remember? He did come up with the MOST CONVOLUTED, IMPLAUSIBLE, YET VERY CONVENIENT PLAN on the spot last week. However, he wasn’t counting on the fact that Cat is actually a “desperate cop in love” and everything is fair in love and war. So Cat lets him know that she lifted his fingerprints from the rubber band martini which she will plant on the murder weapon if he doesn’t comply with her requests. How do you respond to that Loan Shark Ray? Well, he responds by calling Catherine a “stupid bitch” which makes Vincent growl, which distracts Cat, which gives Ray the chance to disarm her. However, once again, Ray wasn’t prepared for the fact that this desperate cop comes with a mythological protective Beast included. Vincent jumps Ray and pins him to the ground. Cat proceeds to threaten Ray again and all threats are more effective when you have a Beast in a tux hovering over you, they just are. After his close encounter of the Beast kind, Ray runs out of the gallery. Evan spots him and runs after him, but he doesn’t get the chance to “take care” of him because Ray spots Gabe and asks for a confession on the spot. Gabe ushers Ray to a secluded room and Evan is left alone in the middle of the party. Perhaps he is not M material after all.

In the meantime, Vincent and Catherine are fleeing the scene of the Beast attack. Vincent is absolutely proud of himself because he was able to remain in control and didn’t kill Loan Shark Ray. It’s so nice to see him NOT hating himself. He is so happy thinking about the fact that people won’t see him as a “monster”; it is adorable [and sad because of what happens later]. He thanks Catherine and she is obviously melting under his gaze [along with everyone in the audience], so she just nervously laughs and says “I should probably leave”. She starts to walk away, Sugar from Wanderhouse kicks in the b.g. and it’s pure perfection from that point on. Vincent calls her name and walks down the stairs [in SLO-MO!]. He keeps walking until he is standing in front of her and without further warning he grabs her and kisses her. Remember how I said last week that even with all the buildup, their first kiss was PERFECT and EPIC? Well… after such an epic first kiss, I had no expectations for their second kiss. I thought it was just going to happen; no way they could top the ROOFTOP KISS. And then they did this! That was one of the best onscreen kisses ever! Once again, everything was perfect: the music, the setting, the clothes, they even did the whole spinning camera super-cliché thing, but I don’t give a damn! I loved every second of it, even the spinning shot! My only complaint is that this scene made me realize that Vincent and Catherine have ruined every other couple I have ever liked on TV! Anyway, after he pulls away Catherine looks at him like he can walk on water, unable utter a single word. He simply says “You are right, I think you should probably leave” and she does. The big mystery being: how the hell is she able to walk? Before we continue with the recap, I know you probably want to watch this a few times so I will kindly provide a video:

OK, after watching/rewinding the last scene countless times, I finally managed to move on to the next scene. Good thing Sendhil is pretty because otherwise I wouldn’t have kept re-watching the kiss for eternity. So, inside a SECLUDED ROOM, Gabe meets with Loan Shark Ray who tries to strike a deal in exchange for his confession. Gabe asks a few questions, like if he got a good look at the “vigilante”. Ray says exactly what Catherine told him to say, but Gabe tells Ray [in a totally threatening tone] “something tells me you are not saying the truth”. The scene ends there, but it is obvious that things aren’t going to end well for Loan Shark Ray… he should have stuck to safer career choices like Portfolio Managing or embezzling. The next day Agent Twilight calls Evan to congratulate him for “killing” Ray. Evan realizes Ray is dead and instead of denying it like any normal person would, he takes “credit” for a murder he didn’t commit [I thought that only happened on The Following]. Turns out murdering innocents was all that took to get into M, because Agent Twilight is very interested in working with Evan from now on. That is just so wrong! Oh Evan…

Joe calls Cat, Tess, Evan and the trigger happy cops [Garwell?] to his office. He tells them they are being consolidated into a task force with the sole purpose of apprehending the “son of a bitch known as the vigilante”. Joe also informs them that ADA Lowen was in charge of vetting them for the task force. He didn’t do a very good job now, did he? He picked a cop who is sleeping with the boss, an M.E. who is a mole for an Evil Organization and the vigilante’s girlfriend. Joe asks if anyone has a problem with it. Everyone is on board and Cat is all “I am in, if by ‘in’ you mean I will be destroying evidence and throwing you off the track of my BOYFRIEND!” Then, Gabe thinks it is a good idea to have a press conference, with his newly created Beast-hunting-task-force standing next to him. You can see poor Cat’s conflict of interest written all over her face as they announce a manhunt for the man of her life, knowing that he is probably watching it on TV.

After the press conference, Cat goes to the WAREHOUSE. Vincent complains about the fact that now he is not only hunted by M, but also by “NY’s finest” including his girlfriend. Cat explains the advantages of having he on the “inside” and tells him she is not going to let anything happen to him. Vincent believes things aren’t going to end well for him [foreshadowing sucks!] and tells her that he doesn't “want to break her heart” [yet he totally broke mine with the way he said that!]. Cat answers with yet another memorable [and quotable] romantic speech:

“The only thing that would break my heart is looking back on my life and wishing that I had done things differently. And, as far as the rest of the world goes… if we are together, we can overcome anything. Vincent, whoever that girl was [seriously, who was she?], she wasn't me. And whatever your fears are, they aren't mine”

She says the last sentence with SO much conviction, it was impossible for him to doubt her. I think she said all the right things. She established that she accepts him, that he wants him and that she will never fear him; which is exactly what our poor-self-loathing beast-needed to hear. He stands up and gently kisses her. And… so it begins, the second sexy scene of the episode; except this one ISN'T a dream and it is actually quite different from the first one. It’s probably a little less steamy than the opening sequence, but I thought it was equally HOT and much more emotional. It was really well shot and the song choice was perfect. Not only was a sexy and emotional tune, but the lyrics seemed to perfectly fit the situation:

“(…) We are islands/Excuses to remain alone/We are moons/Throw ourselves around each other/We are oceans/Being controlled by the pull of another/And I… just want to be loved by you (…)”

The first shot of their hands clasping alone was SO HOT, I could only brace myself for what was coming next! Clothes start flying, they stumble on the bed, it’s all very hot yet sweet [hard balance to achieve]. At one point he pulls away and his eyes start glowing. She simply caresses the side of his face. He quickly goes back to normal and kisses her again. End of episode. That was a great scene and I thought it was a perfect example of a sexy scene that wasn’t just there for ratings or as filler, it was absolutely necessary to the plot and all the right emotions were there… Plus it was damn hot. Did I mention it was hot?

Stay tuned and next week I will CLARIFY a few things on my Insatiable recap.

(*) PS to Twilight fans: I meant no offense by the couple of Twilight jokes. I actually believe there are a lot of things about those movies that work really well [and others that really don’t work], but I have a more complex opinion on them that I can’t go into right now. So I was just poking some light-hearted fun at their expense.

MORE RECAPS HERE

QUOTES

JT: I just spent 3 hours at my office throwing pencils at the ceiling!

JT: Even I get laid by the 23^rd date

Vincent: The truth is, I’ve never felt more out of control than how I do when I am with you

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TVEmpress

The TV Empress is a Media Management graduate, screenwriter in the making (and financial engineer in the meantime). She has serious plans to take over global television. You can follow the TVEmpress on twitter @TVRepublik